But For Real Episode 10: How To Get The Most Out Of Therapy

Podcast
Written By Colleen Werner

Whether you’re currently in therapy or have been exploring finding a therapist, you’ve probably wondered, “How do I get the most out of therapy?”

And with both of our hosts being badass therapists, we’ve got you covered 👏

In this episode, Valerie and Emerson share their top tips for making the most out of your sessions…and Emerson also shares a real therapist moment of ripping her pants at the office 🫣

As always, there’s so much more, including great song recommendations and some hopeful moments to get you through the chaos and heaviness of living in this world.

This episode covers:

Tea & Crumpets

Val recently discovered KINRGY, a super fun dance fitness workout created by Julianne Hough (of Dancing With The Stars), and she’s OBSESSED. It includes dance, cardio, fitness, mindful movement, and breathwork. They offer a virtual on-demand platform, as well as a handful of physical studios, with one in West Nashville right near our Gaia Center office 🤩

Emerson shared an update on her journey with Project Panning, where she picked 25 products (skincare, haircare, cleaning, etc) and is using them until they’re empty instead of buying new ones. She’s been sticking to it and is both saving money and fighting overconsumption–a win-win!

The Lore

A few weeks back, Emerson had one of a therapist’s worst nightmares…ripping her pants and not realizing until halfway through the day. 😳

While we’ll never know if half of Nashville managed to see her a**, it did give Valerie the opportunity to enlighten us on the origins of the term “wardrobe malfunction.” The term was coined after Janet Jackson’s infamous nip slip at the 2004 Super Bowl. 🫣

The DSM: How to Get the Most Out of Therapy

This segment starts with Val and Emerson busting three therapy myths:

  • “Therapy didn’t work for me.”

    • While it may be impossible to find a therapist who is 100% perfect for you, there are SO many styles, approaches, and personalities— so you often have to “kiss some frogs” before you find a good fit!

  • “My therapist will tell me what I should do.”

    • As therapists, we’re not here to tell you to dump your boyfriend or divorce your wife, but… if you come to that conclusion, we’ll be in your corner. 🤪

  • “My therapist should never disagree with me.”

    • While you’re the expert on your own life and we will never judge our clients for making choices we may not necessarily agree with ourselves, we will sometimes challenge you and hold up a mirror. A good therapist will also help you grapple with difficult relational ethics issues without steering you toward a particular choice.

After some myth busting, Emerson shares her top 3 tips for preparing for therapy like a pro: bring a specific topic or focus, journal or take notes between sessions, and be honest, even if it’s messy.

The most important part of therapy is the therapeutic relationship. While choosing the right modality can be important depending on what someone is looking for support with, the biggest factor for success in therapy is the relationship between a client and their therapist! Val’s tips for building a solid relationship with your therapist are to speak up if something isn’t working, remember trust takes time, and don’t ghost your therapist.

If you want more tips on how to “do the work” outside of sessions + what to do when therapy isn’t working, you’ll have to listen to the full episode. 💁🏻‍♀️

Now That’s What I Call…OKAAAAY

Val’s pick for the week was “Volcano Girls” by Veruca Salt. This song was the opening theme to the also quintessential 1999 teen dark comedy film, Jawbreaker. Emerson’s reaction was more or less that it’s the perfect angry feminist, fuck sh*t up anthem, which is very apropos for today’s world, even with it being from the 90s.

Emerson’s pick for the week was “I’m A Mess” by Ed Sheeran. Allegedly, this is Ed’s favorite song from his album X (released June 2014), and it’s the perfect song if you kinda effed up, hurt someone and need to reflect about it.

Fire Dumpster Phoenix

With the current state of the world (has January felt a million years long to anyone else???) finding hope can be ROUGH. But the good news is that even in the darkest moments, there’s hope to be found.

Emerson’s find for the week is an article titled, “Marissa Hermer’s restaurant burned down in the LA wildfires. Now she’s feeding families in need”. After losing her popular restaurant The Draycott due to the wildfires, Marissa launched a food delivery service for those affected by the devastation called YOU GIVE. WE COOK. THEY EAT.

She has opened the kitchens at her two other restaurants to cook warm meals for those displaced and rescue staff. She has already raised enough money to feed 250 families of 4, and anyone in the world can donate by texting DINNER to 707070.

Displaced families can head to her IG @marissahermer to comment for a meal, or you can nominate a family and she will take care of it. Marissa started this meal service during COVID, and they need delivery drivers to help the cause to get food out to families!

Valerie’s find was a story reported by Kang-Chun Cheng for The Monitor about how Daniel Anyang, an aid worker with Light For the World, is helping South Sudanese residents with disabilities create disaster preparedness plans in a time of severe flooding in the area. Daniel joined Light for the World in 2021 and makes weekly site visits to check in with the 800 households that the organization works with across three payams, or subcounties, in South Sudan. He has turned his personal trauma into purpose in such a beautiful, meaningful way.

If you want to learn more about any (or all) of these topics, click the podcast player at the top of this post or the YouTube video down below to listen to the full episode and dive in with us.

Resources + Stuff Mentioned in This Episode:

Connect with Us:

DISCLAIMER: But For Real Podcast is not a substitute for individualized mental health treatment or healthcare. This podcast is solely for entertainment and educational purposes. If you are in crisis, please utilize crisis support services, such as the Crisis Text Line (Text START to 741741 in the US) or the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: (Call 988 in the US), or visit www.findahelpline.com for international resources.

Colleen Werner
Next

But For Real Episode 9: Kicking Off the New Year with Compassionate Self-Discipline