But For Real Episode #3: What is grief, if not love persevering?

Podcast
Written By Colleen Werner

Grief – an inevitable part of life that is often whispered about or only talked about behind closed doors.

But what if we can rewrite everything we’ve been taught about grief and instead connect with and honor it in a way that honors our own unique experiences and needs?

Today’s guest, The Gaia Center’s very own resident grief-expert Kalaway Voss, shares wisdom and tangible ways that we can move through grief, whether it’s the death of a loved one, a more ambiguous loss such as the ending of a relationship, or anything in between.

What We Cover In Today’s Episode

Tea & Crumpets: How To Die Alone, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, and The eX-Files Rewatch Podcast

Whether you want a dramedy (How To Die Alone), a reality dumpster fire (The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives), or a nostalgic rewatch podcast, we’ve got something for you!

Step Into My Office: Kalaway’s advice on coping with the loss of a best friend

Especially with the loss of someone we love so dearly, there is often pressure, and an understandable desire, to “get over grief” or just “push through it.” However, grief isn’t something that we just get over – but it is something that we can learn to integrate with and live with in a way that allows us to engage with our daily lives while still honoring the loss. In this segment, Kalaway provides wisdom on how we can shift our perspectives on grief in a way that embraces it vs. trying to bypass it.

The DSM: All Things Grief

While many people are raised in an environment where grief, loss, and death are taboo topics, Kalaway’s family has always embraced these conversations, which led to it feeling like a safe topic for her to explore. And while grief isn’t going to always (or often) look and feel pretty, it’s not something we have to avoid. In this segment, Kalaway shares a bit on:

  • What healthy grief can look like

  • When grief takes a turn into mental health concerns

  • The cultural and societal influences that impact grief

  • The role the relationship with the deceased impacts the grieving process

  • The differences in navigating loss of a loved one vs. more ambiguous kinds of loss like the ending of a relationship

  • How to practice self-compassion through the grieving process

  • Tangible ways to connect with and honor grief

Now That’s What I Call….Okayyyy

Fire Dumpster Phoenix: Non-Traditional Ways to Honor and Ceremonialize Death

Kalaway shares her experience with creating a memorial garden for her deceased aunt, as well as other nontraditional ways to connect with and honor grief such as cremation diamonds.

Rapid Fire Q&A on Kalaway’s perspectives of grief

Kalaway shares her thoughts on:

  • Her favorite way to make space for grief

  • The Stages of Grief framework— love it or hate it, and why?

  • Her least favorite phrase someone might use to express their well-meaning condolences

  • A movie, book, or show she thinks does a beautiful job depicting grief

  • Her favorite grief metaphor

We are so honored and elated that Kalaway was our first guest and so beautifully shared valuable, nuanced perspectives on grief.

If you’re in Tennessee and looking for someone to help support you in your grief healing journey (whether in person at our office in West Nashville or virtually), she is the therapist for you. You can learn more about her approach + how to work with her here.

Resources + Stuff  Mentioned in This Episode:

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DISCLAIMER: But For Real Podcast is not a substitute for individualized mental health treatment or healthcare. This podcast is solely for entertainment and educational purposes. If you are in crisis, please utilize crisis support services, such as the Crisis Text Line (Text START to 741741 in the US) or the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: (Call 988 in the US), or visit www.findahelpline.com for international resources.

Colleen Werner
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